i wish i could read him as easily as you will read this post...

He inspires me to "just be".
He is my favourite to be near when there is nothing in particular going on.
He is small in body but gigantic in presence, and yet somehow not at all overpowering.
Just present.
Aware... alive.
Sometimes he sits and cries.
Sometimes everything is not ok. And he's ok with that - things not being ok.
He's the first person i've met that really epitomizes that line "can you sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to fix it or fade it." from The Invitation by Oriahe Mountain Dreamer.
He challenges me to do that.
He shares his pain with me, without expecting me to come up with a solution.
Without wanting that at all.
He gives me that gift.
He is beautiful and loving.
I feel like a 'we' but in this healthy way that i've never experienced before.
A 'we' that nourishes and fulfills an "I".
He never comforts me with lies or contradictions.
He asks me questions about what i say, about how i feel, about what that means.
He challenges my negative habits but respects my choices.
I have broken so many things in people.
I have crossed lines and been dishonest to get what i thought i wanted.
And i have been treated the same.
But not with him.
Getting to be this intimate, beautiful part of his life is my absolute pleasure/gift.
And getting to have honest, full access to me is his.
I feel our bond growing every day, even in the face of my own insecurities and i suppose his.
He is so deep in my heart that he can see things i have never even explored, i'm sure.
He is so deep that there is nothing hidden from him.
He is so deep that he could crush me with a heavy breath.
And i keep expecting it.
And it never happens.
I suppose the way we exist cannot continue forever.
I suppose time will change it, shift it, mould it, like it does everything.
But regardless, he has made me harder by making me softer.
Made me stronger by opening my fists.
Made me happier by letting me cry.
And changed my life with his hands on either side of my face and an "i love you" on his lips.